Sugar December 2, 1985 - February 26,2010

I want to take a break from kidding around today to dedicate this blog to my cat, Sugar, who passed away this morning. My pretty girl was 24 years old. I rescued her from an abusive household several years ago, and I am proud to say I gave her 8 happy years of life that she probably otherwise would not have enjoyed. We miss you already, Shoug.

Does anything ever happen today? The phrase "the other day" (a worn-out favorite of stand-up comics) has become an unprecedented part of our vernacular. Okay, technically, it is probably upstaged by "uh" and "ya' know what I'm sayin"?" But those are relentless rhetoric. Point is that "the other day" implies that there is a specific day to which the speaker is referring that should be taken into account in order for the day of point to be of consequence.

I have never heard anyone say, "Two days have passed this week. One of those days was rainy. The other day, I was stuck in traffic."

Ya' know what I'm sayin'?

When writing in cyberspace, whether it be email (which used to be hyphenated), web logs (blogs), news reports (newports?), or, yes, I have seen it, online college dissertations, the trend seems to be brevity. So why do we say so much when we talk? (And by "we," I mean "you.")

Case of point (makes more sense than "case in point")...is it really necessary to say that you are going in two different (or separate) directions? Have you ever seen someone going in two directions that were not different or separate?

News flash--that is ONE direction!

If Brad Pitt had married Gwyneth Paltrow, would they still have named their daughter "Apple?" (For those of you who might be a little slow, her name would be Apple Pitt.)

Wouldja' like to take a survey? Consider if you will, the bathroom...you're sitting there looking at the roll of toilet tissue. You see there are eight squares of tissue left on the roll. For some strange and deranged reason, you happen to know that you need only seven squares. (How you know this? Well, that's another post.) Do you use the seven you need and leave the last one so the next person has to change the roll? Or do you ditch the whole thing and change the roll to start over? Or do you use all eight squares (essentially wasting an entire square? Or do you use the seven squares you need now, and lay the last square aside for whoever needs it?

Why do we crumple up pieces of paper before we throw them away? Security?

I'm going to stop trying to save time. I never know where to put it.

Is anyone ever combobulated?