The Wrong Guy

MOVIE REVIEW OF The Wrong Guy (1997) PG-13

Cast
Director:	David Steinberg	Runtime: 1hrs 32min ( 92min)
nelson hibbert	.....	dave foley
detective arlen	.....	david anthony higgins
lynn holden	.....	jennifer tilly
fred holden	.....	joe flaherty
ken daly	.....	dan redican
farmer brown	.....	alan scarfe
mr. nagel	.....	kenneth welsh
creepy guy	.....	enrico colantoni
the killer	.....	colm feore
bus station worker	.....	arnie achtman
gas station guy	.....	boyd banks
cindy	.....	johanna black
manicurist	.....	valerie boyce
juddidam	.....	alan bridle
nagel's secretary	.....	dana brooks
engineer	.....	martin brown
jimmy	.....	richard chevolleau
oklahoma cop	.....	jeff clarke
dr. harris	.....	gina clayton
policeman #1	.....	steven page
policeman #2	.....	tyler stewart
policeman #3	.....	ed robertson
policeman #4	.....	jim creeggan
policeman #5	.....	kevin hearn
texas cop	.....	glenn cross
small town man #1	.....	jack jessop
small town man #2	.....	bruce deller
missouri cop	.....	don dickinson
maitre'd	.....	reg dreger
office worker #1	.....	chantal quesnelle
office worker #2	.....	david farant
office worker #3	.....	glenda rush
crime show host	.....	barry flatman
indiana policeman	.....	calvin green
man in elevator	.....	don kelly
bus driver	.....	jay kogen
miss crystal ball	.....	carmelina lamanna
denise	.....	lindsay leese
gavin	.....	william lynn
anchorwoman	.....	arlene mazerolle
captain hughes	.....	robin mcCulloch
motel manager	.....	kevin mcDonald
federal officer	.....	bruce mcFee
teamster	.....	gerry menicino
cleveland detective	.....	steve michalchuk
french restaurant waiter	.....	carlo rota
policeman at gas station	.....	hadley sandiford
quartet bus driver	.....	guy sanvido
security guard	.....	ralph small
outpatient	.....	david steinberg
constance nagel	.....	haley tyson
wallace	.....	mike wilmot

PLOT SUMMARY

Nelson Hibbert (Dave Foley), Vice-President of Requisitions and Non-Human Resources for Nagel Industries in Cleveland, is on his way up the corporate ladder...in fact, he is sure he has the title of President in the bag. Besides, he's engaged to the current President Nagel's (Kenneth Welsh) daughter.

But when the position is given to someone else, Nelson is outraged and threatens, in a roundabout way, to kill Nagel by announcing, "you are dead to me."

As luck(?) would have it, at 10:37 a.m., Nagel gets stabbed in the back of the neck. At 10:38 a.m. Nelson finds the body, grabs the knife, and runs out of the building in a panic. Thinking he is the prime suspect, he takes course to head to Mexico.

Meanwhile, back in Cleveland, the authorities have confirmed via videotape that someone else actually committed the murder.

Through a series of events, the real killer (Colm Feore) gets the impression that Nelson is actually a kind of super-cop, who is following him. In reality, the killer is being followed, but by the police, headed by Detective Arlen (David Anthony Higgins) of the Cleveland PD, who is taking advantage of his unlimited resources.

Nelson finds himself in the tiny farm town of Metcalf, Missouri, where he meets a narcoleptic girl named Lynn (Jennifer Tilly) and her father (Joe Flaherty).

Another round of misadventures bring all the significant players together for a final, albeit mild, shootout (?).

TECH INSPECTION

As far as the public success of this movie, it was rather drab in Canada in both video and DVD format, and it was never released theatrically in the U.S. In my opinion, that is a real disappointment; for the following reasons...

I love movie/television/book references, and this movie has more than one. For instance, can you guess which classic movie this monologue references?

This newspaper's owned by Farmer Brown. He's been trying to shut us down for years. Edgar, your father got the money for that house you're livin' in from the bank. Jacob, you remember when you needed money to start that men's jewelry store?...Well, you didn't get it from Brown, you got it from us. Yeah, I had to foreclose on ya', but...well, it wasn't a good idea, was it? Everybody look, the money from this bank is in that town.

Have you seen It's a Wonderful Life yet this year? Skip to the part where George saves the B & L using his honeymoon money.

There is also a short allusion to Al Pacino in Scarface (except that here, handguns are used instead of fully automatic assault weapons), as well as Nelson using a voice that is what I took as an imitation of Steve Martin using one of his funny voices.

And if you don't spot those, you certainly can't miss the classic Wile E. Coyote ACME fake hole gag at the beginning.

This is a rehash of the theme of mistaken identity, but with several varieties of twist. This makes for a relatively new idea.

Anyone who remembers Dave Foley from The Kids in the Hall or NewsRadio will know that he can be hilarious as a straight man. In The Wrong Guy, though, you can see that he is equally as funny playing a paranoid, hyperactive spaz.

The other characters have their own unique querks that just add to the humor of the movie, written by Foley and David Anthony Higgins (Detective Arlen). For example, Lynn is a narcoleptic who inconveniently has her spells while behind the wheel of an automobile!

Whereas many of the one-liners are hilarious, most of them would not survive without the accompanying facial expressions and reactions. Physical comedy rivals the spoken jokes throughout the movie.

This is further testimony to my hypothesis that foreign actors and movies are often of higher quality than those from the U.S. (at least for the past 50 years).

There's not much more to be said to further the technical evaluation of this film, so just see it for yourself and hopefully you will get up with a smile on your face and a happy mood in your mind.

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Nelson : Morning...Big day today...Hey, fellas, today's the big day, huh? G'morning...Morning...Top o' the morning, m'lady. Good morning, big day, huh? Morning. Good morning, Cindy.
  Cindy : Morning mister...
  Nelson : Hibbert. Today's a big day for me.
  Cindy : Really? Ah, good for you.
  Nelson : All set for the big day? Hi! Today's the day. Hey fellas, how 'bout that game last night?
  Water Cooler Guy #1 : What game?
  Water Cooler Guy #2 : There was no game last night.
  Nelson : Gotta go...Hey there. Morning to you. Good morning. Hey, how's it goin'? Morning, folks. Good morning, Denise.
  Denise : Good morning, Mister Hibbert.
• Nelson : Hi. How far will...36 dollars get me?
  Bus Station Clerk : You're there.
• Nelson : Lynn, this may get dangerous. You may want to get two teabags and a sheet of wax paper.
• Lynn : Did I have one of my spells again?
  Nelson : Yes, you did. But those of us who chose to wear seatbelts are fine.
• Killer : You're awake!
  Nelson : Yeah. For awhile now.
  Killer : I've been carrying you!
  Nelson : I thought you wanted to.
• Arlen : There has to be some way out of this.
  Killer : What do you suggest?
  Arlen : Give yourself up?
  Killer : How does that help me?
  Arlen : I don't know.

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
⁹ /₁₀

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Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte

MOVIE REVIEW OF Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte (1964) NOT RATED

Cast
Director:	robert aldrich	Runtime: 2hrs 13min ( 133 min)
charlotte hollis	.....	bette davis
miriam deering	.....	olivia de havilland
dr. drew baliss	.....	joseph cotten
velma cruther	.....	agnes moorehead
harry wills	.....	cecil kellaway
sam hollis	.....	victor buono
jewel mayhew	.....	mary astor
sheriff luke standish	.....	wesley addy
paul marchand	.....	william campbell
john mayhew	.....	bruce dern
editor	.....	frank ferguson
foreman	.....	george kennedy
taxi driver	.....	dave willock
gang leader	.....	michael petit
new boy	.....	john manga
2nd boy	.....	kelly flynn
funeral director	.....	percy helton
young girl	.....	alida aldrich
3rd boy	.....	kelly aldrich
boy dancer	.....	willam aldrich
geraldine	.....	carol delay
nellie	.....	ellen corby
town gossip	.....	marianne stewart
town gossip	.....	helen kleeps
cleaning woman	.....	lillian randolph
cleaning woman	.....	geraldine west
cleaning woman	.....	mary henderson
chauffeur	.....	bill walker
ginny mae	.....	idell james
band at party	.....	teddy buckner and his all - stars

PLOT SUMMARY

It is 1927 Louisiana. Sam Hollis (Victor Buono) is a big time rich southerner who has learned of one of his precious daughters' (Charlotte - Bette Davis) plans to elope with a married man (John Mayhew - Bruce Dern).

At a party in the Hollis mansion, John is told to inform Charlotte that he has changed his mind and does not wish to continue the relationship.

After a violent scene in which John ends up without a head or right hand, the scene moves to the ballroom, where Charlotte enters in a blood-stained dress.

Skip ahead 37 years to 1964 in the same mansion. However, now it is not more than a broken down house with only one stubborn resident (Betty Davis) and her housemaid (Agnes Moorehead). Charlotte has been mocked, teased, and shunned her entire life...being accused of getting away with John Mayhew's murder. Her distress is furthered by the State Louisiana Highway Commission, who is trying to tear down her beloved home in order to build a connection bridge. She is told she has one week to leave. She has no intention of doing so.

Charlotte thinks her only hope for saving her home is to write to her cousin Miriam (Olivia de Havilland), asking her to come to the mansion and fight the authorities. Miriam shows up, but realizes that there is no hope for the cause, instead deciding this would be the perfect opportunity to have Charlotte committed to an asylum, taking what is left of Charlotte's inheritance. With the help of Charlotte's doctor, Dr. Drew Bayliss (Joseph Cotten), who also happens to be a former lover of Miriam's. Together, Miriam and Drew set up scenarios, along with drugs, to convince Charlotte that John has come back for her. Of course, in the meantime, convincing everyone else that she needs to be committed.

In the background of the plot, enter Harry Wills (Cecil Kellaway), the lawyer for Jewel Mayhew (Mary Astor). He is interested in the 37-year-old case because of some odd circumstances surrounding the incident. He meets with Jewel to find out some enlightening information. She gives Harry a sealed letter and tells him not to open it until the time of her death, which is on the horizon.

You need to see the movie for the specifics, but I can assure you that disappointment is not an emotion you will encounter. Although shock is almost guaranteed.

TECH INSPECTION

Although typical Betty Davis attitude permeates this movie, the actress is a victim in this case rather than the antagonist. Davis is remindful of Ingrid Bergman in the 1944 film Gaslight, although Paula Alquist is an innocent, likeable character, whereas Charlotte Hollis...not so much.

NOTE OF INTEREST: Joseph Cotten appeared in both Gaslight and Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte. Incidentally, in the former, you are routing for his character, in this film, you are never quite sure.

Bette Davis made this film after years of experience and fame in Hollywood. However, I found that in more than one spot, her delivery to be amateurish for film. Her performance seemed over-dramatic as you might expect from a stage play or vaudeville act.

Olivia de Havilland delivers the most captivating performance as Charlotte's cousin Miriam. Miriam is appealing in appearance and personality in the public eye, she is appalling in character behind closed doors.

The movie on the whole is one to watch. The twists in the plot are remindful of an Alfred Hitchcock film. Although not as frightening, the camera shots are sometimes more graphic than the shower scene in Psycho.

Finally, I will call your attention to the beginning of the movie when Charlotte is yelling at the construction workers to stop what they are doing. Out of anger, she pushes an enormous urn off the second floor balcony to come crashing on to the concrete below, barely missing the construction foreman (George Kennedy). Remember this scene in the last few minutes of the movie.

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Sam Hollis : You guiltless soft-suckin' swine!
• party guest : Champagne wouldn't be half as fun without prohibition.
• Charlotte : But this is my home. I haven't any other place to go. They can build their damn bridge anywhere.
  Sheriff Standish : No, ma'am. They have to build it to meet up with the road on the other side of the river.
• Charlotte : What is it you call your job? Oh, yes, public relations. Sounds like something pretty dirty to me.
• Dr. Drew : People who oblige to live alone have a habit of creating company for themselves.
• Jewel : Go away from me!
• Wills : You're my favorite living mystery.
  Charlotte : Have you ever solved me?
  Wills : No.
• Velma : Well, what about when she comes back? Or ain't she comin' back?
  Miriam : Since the house won't be here, I hardly think that's relevant.
• Velma : So you're finally showin' the right side of your face, ain't ya'?

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
⁹ /₁₀

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Billy Elliot

MOVIE REVIEW OF Billy Elliot (2000) R (PG-13 video version)

Cast
Director:	Stephen Daudry	Runtime: 1 hrs 50min ( 110 min)
billy elliot	.....	jamie bell
nan	.....	jean heywood
tony elliot	.....	jamie draven
jackie elliot	.....	gary lewis
michael caffery	.....	stuart wells
george watson	.....	mike elliot
mr. braithwaite	.....	billy fane
debbie wilkinson	.....	nicola blackwell
mrs, wilkinson	.....	julie waters
librarian	.....	carol mcGuigan
gary poulson	.....	joe renton
mr. tom wilkinson	.....	colin maclachlan
billy's mom	.....	janine birkett
PC jeff peverly	.....	trevor fox
sheila briggs	.....	charlie hardwick
miner	.....	denny ferguson
NCB offcial	.....	dennis lingard
simon	.....	matthew thomas
Dr. Crane ( ballet doctor)	.....	steve mangan
tutor in medical	.....	paul ridley
principal	.....	patrick malahide
vice - principal	.....	barbara leigh - hunt
tutor #1	.....	imogen claire
tutor #2	.....	diana kent
tutor #3	.....	neil north
tutor #4	.....	lee williams
teacher	.....	petra siniawski
secretary	.....	merelina kendall
sandra	.....	zoe bell
geography teacher	.....	tracey wilkinson
michael (age 25)	.....	merryn owen
billy (age 25)	.....	adam cooper

PLOT SUMMARY

This is a brilliant exhibition of the importance of individuality. Going along with the crowd is sometimes advantageous, yet other times, it can be the death of you.

The movie begins in 1984 in Durham Coalfield in North East England. Jamie Bell plays 11-year-old Billy Elliot, the younger of two sons in a working-class family with a single father (Gary Lewis). They live in a coal-mining community with Billy's grandmother Nan.

The area is in a political uproar from a Union strike causing riots and protests in the streets. The Elliots are barely keeping afloat.

Meanwhile, Billy's father Jackie is sending him off to boxing lessons every week, where Billy is flailing and failing miserably.

When he arrives for his workout one day, the boys are informed that one end of the gym is going to be used by the dancing instructor from downstairs (Julie Waters) because her area is being set up as a soup kitchen for the striking coal miners.

The group of dancers captures the attention of Billy, and he becomes more interested in what they are doing than in boxing, for which he has no talent or skill.

Billy begins to secretly attend the dancing classes instead of his boxing sessions. When his father and brother Tony (Jamie Draven) find out, he is forbidden to continue for fear of him being seeing as a sissy or poof.

Sure enough, Billy is ridiculed by his family and friends, except for his best friend, Michael (Stuart Wells), who reveals himself to be a closet-gay, and supports Billy in his efforts with the ballet.

Jackie is picketing, and Tony is getting in trouble with the police concerning the Union strike in which they are both involved. Initially outraged to the point of violence at Billy's choice of ballet, Jackie is finally torn with emotional conflict when he sees Billy's natural talent first-hand; going so far as to pawn his late wife's jewelry and attempt to cross the picket line so he might afford to send Billy to a prestigious ballet school in London.

TECH INSPECTION

Billy Elliot was filmed in a former mining community in the UK and originally released in Ireland. The cast is superb, as are the performances. As is the case with a vast majority of foreign actors, this company gives highly convincing performances that seem very natural on-screen, as opposed to many American movies, which often seem contrived or manufactured.

These actors rely on their talent, rather than publicity or looks, for the quality of the final cut.

The score aptly follows the varying benchmark changes in mood of the movie, while scenes of Billy's boxing and dancing are inter-cut with scenes from the riots at the coal mines to exhibit an ironic parallel.

The plot may seem a little drawn out, but it contributes to artistic value and deep development of characters. Note the running theme of Swan Lake throughout the movie.

As is the reverse of orthodoxy, Billy Elliot was written first as a screenplay, then novelized, and finally adapted to the stage.

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Michael: Look at them gloves. They're outdated.
  Billy:They're me dad's, these.
  Michael:Exactly.
• Mrs. Wilkinson:Oh, for fuck's sake, Billy. If you want to piss about with your little mates, that's fine with me.
  Billy:Alright, alright, don't lose your blob.
• Mrs. Wilkinson:She must've been a very special woman, your mother.
  Billy:No, she was just me mom.
• Tony:He's only a bairn. What about giving him a childhood?
  Billy:I don't want a childhood. I want to be a ballet dancer.
• Billy:Just because I like ballet doesn't mean I'm a poof, ya' know.
• Jackie:Is that absolutely necessary? Walk normal, will ya'?
• Billy:Dad! Dad! Dad, for fuck's sake! I've changed me mind.
  Jackie:Get back in there. Don't be so stupid.
• NCB Official:Well, was there any particular aspect of the ballet which caught your attention?
  Billy:The dancin'

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰ /₁₀

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The Out of Towners

MOVIE REVIEW OF The Out-of-Towners (1970) G

Cast
Director	arthur hiller	Runtime: 1 hrs 41 min (101 min)
george kellerman	.....	jack lemmon
gwen kellerman	.....	sandy dennis
TV man	.....	sandy baron
woman in police station	.....	anne meara
man on airplane	.....	robert nichols
airline stewardess	.....	ann prentiss
boston cab driver	.....	ron carey
officer meyers	.....	phil bruns
murray	.....	graham jarvis
cuban diplomat	.....	carlos montalban
agent in boston	.....	robert king
waiter on train	.....	johnny brown
police sergeant	.....	dolph sweet
police officer	.....	jack crowder
looter #1	.....	jon korkes
looter #2	.....	robert walden
baggage man in boston	.....	richard libertini
daytime hotel clerk	.....	paul dooley
night desk clerk	.....	anthony holland
lost & found clerk in boston	.....	billy dee williams
man in phone booth in boston	.....	bob bennett
bellhop	.....	alfred mazza
sweeper	.....	b. paipert
liquor store looter	.....	philip suriano
porter	.....	a. p. westcott

PLOT SUMMARY

Murphy has nothing on the trip George and Gwendolyn Kellerman (Jack Lemmon and Sandy Dennis) take to New York City. If something can go wrong, it will...and everything else will, too!

George Kellerman is a businessman at a major plastics company in Twin Oaks, Ohio. When he is offered a big promotion, he must travel to New York City for an interview. The interview is not a problem. As he states himself, he is "a shoe-in, the interview is just a formality." And he's right. What he needs to worry about is getting there! And the trouble starts after only 5 seconds into the movie when George's wife Gwen runs back into the house because she has forgotten her purse. From there it only gets worse.

This movie will have you constantly trying to catch your breath for a little over an hour and a half. You will be exhausted when it is almost over and there is a slight reprieve while the couple exchange a touching conversation in their New York hotel suite. But just when you think their lives will return some sanity...well, see for yourself...

Jack Lemmon gives his typical hyper-minded comedic performance while Sandy Dennis tags along as his wife who mildly tries to point out what George might reconsider in order to avoid the next disaster. George uses his twisted, yet inarguable logic to explain why his way will be better, but in effect, making it worse.

This movie is just one big mishap piled onto the one thirty seconds before.

NOTE: DO NOT watch the 1999 remake with Steve Martin and Goldie Hawn. It is horrible not only in comparison, but in itself. I hesitated to even mention it in this review except as in the form of a warning against it.

TECH INSPECTION

I do not like all the countdowns that list the best [whatever] of all-time. Usually, these are based on such superficial points as a certain actor who appears in the movie, popularity of the genre at the time, or how much money was spent on special effects and promotion.

I also think that to each his own. If you don't care for science fiction, for example, then you are not going to think that Star Wars is the best movie of all time. Also, I don't like to pinpoint a movie as my personal favorite of my own, as I have a separate favorite for each differing type of movie category (e.g. drama, action, comedy, thriller, etc.). But if I took my favorite movie from each category and compared them, I do believe this one would win out over all the others.

I do not have a single bad thing to say about any aspect of this movie. From the writer (Neil Simon), to the actors, to the constantly on-the-move photography, to the aptly scored music, to the clever situation and brilliantly delivered lines; and all without sacrificing a simple but good plot, which actually turns out to be more of a MacGuffin.

If I had known I was going to love this movie this much when I first saw it, I would have counted the number of times I have seen it since then. I would guess it's been at least 20. (Oh come on. Those of you who claim to have seen the same film over a hundred times, even though you're only 15 years old...that's just ridiculous.)

QUOTES
For the favorite quotes section of this review, I have had to expand it beyond my usual five to ten entries. To list them all, I might as well just transcribe the entire script. As it is, here are what I consider to be the best of the best:

• Stewardess: I imagine we've run into some bad weather.
  
  
  George: You don't have to imagine, just look out the window.
• Baggage Man: It's not gonna help to get excited.
  
  
  George:Yeah, it's not gonna hurt, either.
• Did I get my eyes on backwards? ~ Gwen
• I think I glued my eye together ~ Gwen
• Quotes from Gwen:
  
  
  I wasn't worried about the schools.
  
  

  I wasn't worried about the dog.
  
  

  I wasn't worried about the car.
  
  

  I wasn't worried about the weather.
  
  

  I wasn't worried about the luggage.
  
  

  I 'm not worried.
• Of course it's big, that's why they call it New York ~ George
• George:We're not landing, we're circling
  
  
  Stewardess:We are circling prior to landing
  
  

  George:Yes, but if we keep circling and circling, that's not circling, that's flying. Is it possible to make coffee during flying?
• Stewardess:We are not permitted to serve beverages during takeoff or landing...Oh, would you like a glass of water?
George:Isn't water a beverage?
• George:They lost our luggage?!
  
  
  Gwen:They did't lose it, they just can't find it. They'll find it.
  
  

  George:Well supposing they don't find it.
  
  

  Gwen:Well then it's lost.
  
  

  George:I just said that!
• George! George Kellerman! You see? First you waste my time trying to get my name right, then you get my name wrong. George! George! First they lose my baggage, then they're going to send it to some nut named Frank. You're going to hear from me if I don't hear from you. GEORGE! GEORGE! NOT FRANK! ~ George
• Is it necessary to spend two minutes telling me you can't make it in ten minutes? ~ George
• George:Two chicken sandwiches, please
  
  
  Waiter:Sorry, no chicken
  
  

  George:Isn't that chicken?
  
  

  Waiter:Yeah, that's chicken. And when he eats, that's the end of the chicken.
  
  

  Gwen:They're out of chicken, George
• Oh my God, I lost my left eyelash ~ Gwen
• Look, I want my bags put on a plane now, and I want them right here where I am, not where I was before you didn't get me there...here ~ George
• Oh my God! ~ Gwen
• Gwen:He had a knife under the cape
  
  
  George:Did you see the knife?
  
  

  Gwen:A man doesn't stand over you at 4:00 in the morning in a cape if he doesn't have a knife, does he?
  
  

  George:I don't know. It never came up before
• The church is closed? ~ George
• Now everybody, sit down and be quiet. This plane is going to Havana, Cuba! ~ Hijacker

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
+ ¹² /₁₀

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White & Nerdy test

Taking inspiration from the musical and lyrical genius (I'm being serious there) of "Weird" Al Yankovic, I have listed below, the points in the song "White & Nerdy" (parody of "Ridin' Dirty" by Chamillionaire). There are links to both of these videos at the end of this post, but I'm afraid if I put them here, you will forget to come back, so hold your horses. In the far right columns, I have noted whether or not I qualify for that particular aspect. Below the chart, you will find the tally and results of this test as applied to me; below that, my analysis and conclusion.

Although I am unable to do anything interactive here in this blog, I encourage you to follow along, writing down your own answers as they apply to you. Find out just how white & nerdy you are, and let me know that I'm not alone. You can post your results and any comments in the comments below this post.

NOTE: It is very possible to be "whiter than sour cream" without actually having white skin.

Have Fun!!

Test Lyric			Yes	No
1. You see me mowin' my front lawn			Θ
2. First in my class here at MIT				Θ
3. Got skills, I'm a champion at D & D				Θ
4. M.C.Escher, that's my favorite M.C.			Θ
5. Keep your 40, I'll just have and Earl Grey tea			Θ
6. My rims never spin, to the contrary, you'll find that they're quite stationary			Θ
7. All of my action figures are cherry				Θ
8. Stephen Hawkings in my library				Θ
9. My MySpace page is totally pimped out				Θ
10. I know Pi to a thousand places				Θ
11. Ain't got no grills, but I still wear braces				Θ
12. I order all my sandwiches with mayonnaise			Θ	Θ
13. I'm a wiz at Minesweeper, I could play for days			Θ
14. There's no killer app I haven't run				Θ
15. At PASCAL, well I'm number one				Θ
16. Do vector calculus just for fun				Θ
17. I ain't got a gat, but I got a soldering gun			Θ
18. "Happy Days" is my favorite theme song				Θ
19. I could sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong				Θ
20. I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on			Θ
21. I'm fluent in JavaScript...			Θ
22. ...as well as Klingon				Θ
23. You see me roll on my Segway				Θ
24. I been browsin', inspectin' X-Men comics, you know I collect 'em			Θ
25. The pens in my pocket, I must protect 'em				Θ
26. My ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored				Θ
27. Shoppin' online for deals on some writable media			Θ
28. I edit Wikipedia				Θ
29. I memorized "Holy Grail" really well				Θ
30. I got a business doing websites			Θ
31. When my friends need some code, who do they call? I do HTML for them all			Θ
32. Even made a homepage for my dog [cat]			Θ
33. I got myself a fanny pack			Θ
34. Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap				Θ
35. I was in AV Club...[didn't have one]				Θ
36. ...and Glee Club...[didn't have one]				Θ
37. ...and even the Chess Team [didn't have one]				Θ
38. Only question I ever thought was hard, was, "do I like Kirk, or do I like Picard?"			Θ
39. Spend every weekend at the Renaissance Faire				Θ
40. Got my name on my underwear [I can explain!!]			Θ

Results
Total Yes	Total No
17	23
Percent Yes	Percent No
42.5%	57.5%

How many "yes" boxes did you check?

0-10 = GRC (Generally Recognized as Cool)

11-20 = still socially acceptable

21-30 = too White & Nerdy

31-40 = whiter than sour cream

It's apparent I'm still socially acceptable (even after giving a bonus yes for using capital Theta as my column marker). How 'bout you? Please ask yourself the above questions, record your score and comment below.

As promised, here are the links to the videos for "White & Nerdy" and "Ridin' Dirty".

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Angels with Dirty Faces

MOVIE REVIEW OF Angels with Dirty Faces (1939)

Cast
Director	Michael Curtiz	Runtime: 1hrs 37min ( 97min)
rocky sullivan	.....	james cagney
jerry connelly	.....	pat o' brien
james frazier	.....	humphrey bogart
laury ferguson	.....	ann sheridan
mac keefer	.....	george bancroft
soapy	.....	billy halop
swing	.....	bobby jordan
bim	.....	leo gorcey
pasty	.....	gabriel dell
crab	.....	huntz hall
hunky	.....	bernard punsley
steve	.....	joe downing
edwards	.....	edward pawley
blackie	.....	adrian morris
young rocky	.....	frankie burke
young jerry	.....	william tracey
young laurie	.....	marilyn knowlden
church choir	.....	st. brenden's church choir (the robert mitchell boy choir)

PLOT SUMMARY

William Sullivan, a.k.a. Rocky (James Cagney) lives a life of crime, starting with petty crimes committed with his childhood pal Jerry Connelly (Pat O'Brien). When he gets put away for a heist involving a million dollars, there's not much his lawyer, Jim Frazier (Humphrey Bogart) can do for him. Rocky says he'll take his own rap again, as he's always done, but makes Frazier promise to hold his cut of the money for him until he gets out of jail.

Rocky gets out and returns to the old neighborhood to seek out Frazier and get his cash. He meets up again with Jerry, now 15 years older, who has turned over a different leaf by becoming a priest. He also finds, by accident, and old girl rival, Laury (Anne Sheridan).

The town, and the old gang, are all run by a syndicate. When it's decided that Rocky needs to be eliminated, Rocky doesn't agree, and things start to get hairy on the crime front.

In the meantime, Rocky meets up with the new rising group of future miscreants (The Dead End Kids), and although he sees himself in them and vice versa, he tries to show them that a life of crime isn't for the weak of heart or mind.

TECH INSPECTION

The actor playing Rocky as a kid (Frankie Burke) is a dead ringer for James Cagney. And he plays the part as well as if he really were a young James Cagney.

This movie utilizes the typical 30s movie technique of using newspaper headlines to move the story along. It is a relatively less violent gangster movie. Still don't think it's a merry-go-round film. There's still a fair share of violence and gunplay. You'll certainly get your 30s gangster fix, all dolled up with James Cagney at the wheel. There aren't enough meows available for an accurate rating of this terrific gunflick.

If there is anything negative about this movie, it would be cruel to mention it. It would be nothing but an undeserved cheap shot at a fantastic movie. If you'll notice almost all quotes come from Rocky Sullivan. What did you expect...it's a James Cagney movie!

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Waddya hear? Waddya say? ~ Rocky Sullivan
• Ya' know, you turned out to be a snappy lookin' dish. ~ Rocky Sullivan
• There ain't no future in playin' basketball. ~ Bim
• Empty ~ Cop #1 So is your thick skull, copper. ~ Rocky Sullivan
• Well, if you didn't do nothin', don't do it again ~ Rocky Sullivan
• Like sittin' in a barber chair. Gonna ask me, 'Got anything to say?' And I say, 'Sure. A haircut, a shave, and a massage. One of those nice new electric massages.' ~ Rocky Sullivan
• Promise you won't let me hear you pray. ~ Rocky Sullivan
• Let's go say a prayer for a boy who couldn't run as fast as I could. ~ Jerry Connelly

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰/₁₀

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