Galaxy Quest

MOVIE REVIEW OF Galaxy Quest (1999) PG

Cast
Director:	dean parisot	Runtime: 1hrs 42min ( 102min)
jason nesmith (a.k.a. commander peter quincy taggart)	.....	tim allen
gwen deMarco (a.k.a. lieutenant tawny madison)	.....	sigourney weaver
alexander dane (a.k.a. dr. lazarus)	.....	alan rickman
fred kwan (a.k.a. tech sergeant chen)	.....	tony shaloub
guy fleegman (a.k.a. crewman #6 / security chief "roc" ingersoll)	.....	sam rockwell
tommy webber (a.k.a. lieutenant laredo)	.....	daryl mitchell
mathesar	.....	enrico colantoni
general sarris	.....	robin sachs
quellek	.....	patrick breen
laliari	.....	missi pyle
teb	.....	jed rees
brandon	.....	justin long
kyle	.....	jeremy howard
katelyn	.....	kaitlin cullum
hollister	.....	jonathan feyer
tommy webber (age 9)	.....	corbin bleu
lathe	.....	wayne pére
neru	.....	samuel lloyd
autograph fan #1	.....	bill chott
autograph fan #2	.....	morgan rusler
autograph fan #3	.....	gregg binkley
navigator	.....	dan gunther
lahnk	.....	rainn wilson
brandon's mother	.....	heidi swedberg
sarris's guard	.....	isaac c. singleton, jr.
reporter	.....	jerry penacoli
announcer	.....	kevin hamilton mcDonald
inventory clerk	.....	dawn hutchins
voice of computer	.....	joe frank

WHAT I KNOW

Even after 18 years, the following of the Galaxy Quest television show is strong. At a sci-fi convention, kids (well, they look and act like kids) still swarm the autograph table donning rather embarrassing costumes, paying $15 for the John Hancock of the veteran (read out-of-work) actors who made the show a hit.

Behind the scenes, however, there is turmoil. We have Gwen (Sigourney Weaver), who played the…well…she repeated whatever the ship computer said. There is Fred (Tony Shaloub), tech sergeant on the show, but a bit aloof in his own mind. Alex (Alan Rickman) wishes he were somewhere else, literally and in his career. Tommy was the kid star on the original show, now all grown up. And finally, Jason Nesmith (Tim Allen) a.k.a. Commander Peter Quincy Taggart, star of the show and self-proclaimed ego maniac. Apparently blinded by his own self-interest (i.e. interest in himself), he is the cause of upset and unease behind the scenes at the reunion of the clan.

This animosity does nothing to help Nesmith when he returns from being taken by actual aliens (Thermians from the Klatu Nebula) who need help in defeating an intergalactic (well, we're supposing he's not just local) warlord named Sarris (Robin Sachs). Nesmith pleads with his co-actors to come with him to fight for the survival of his new-found friends. They dismiss him initially, but after careful contemplation (about 3 seconds, before they realize they don't have another gig), they decide to go with him. It doesn't take much time or effort to convince the actors that these are real aliens and that this is more than just a gig!

As it turns out, the Thermians have developed their society around the documentary transmissions of the Galaxy Quest TV show. They have built exact working replicas of all the components of the show (i.e. ship and all controls). Now, they are recruiting the cast, whom they believe to be a real crew, to fight the space warrior, Sarris.

The actors, realizing this is not a game or gig, play along, at times actually seeming to enjoy the experience. For a moment, they seem to forget their internal animosity in order to help the naïve band of Thermians restore peace and freedom to their people.

With some help from a fan on Earth (Justin Long) and his nerdy friends, an epic battle ensues that gives victory to…nah…, not gonna do it…you gotta watch the moive…but read on to see what I personally thought of it…

WHAT I THINK

This movie literally has an all-star cast that can't be beat. You've got Tim Allen (Home Improvement), Sigourney Weaver (Alien), Alan Rickman (Harry Potter), Tony Shaloub (Monk), Sam Rockwell (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy), Enrico Colantoni (Just Shoot Me!), and Rainn Wilson (The Office), all in prominent roles in one of the most legitimately funny contemporary movies I have seen in years.

I will admit that when I saw that I was to be reviewing this movie, I was expecting and preparing to write a review for a cheesy, b-grade film filled with stupid jokes and a weak plot line. I was already trying to think of how I would politely rip the performances of respected actors and actresses without seeming like an ass myself.

Turns out I was worrying for nothing. I didn't have to rip anyone, including the writers (David Howard and Robert Gordon). I was happily surprised that I found myself looking forward to the repeated viewings I usually endure in order to write my review.

I will begin with the one thing that impressed me the most…the brilliant performance of Enrico Colantoni as Mathesar, leader of the Thermians. He has created an alien character not at all like I have seen before, most notably in his speech patterns. In addition, he perpetuates the characterizations unerringly throughout the entire film. As simple as this looks on paper (screen), when you watch the character, you will understand why I consider this a remarkable feat.

As for the other performances, they hold up to what you would expect from such actors of this caliber. Were that not the case, I wouldn't have bothered to write this review, except for maybe another worst movie week, which is always good for a laugh. I mean, we're talking about Adrian Monk and Severus Snape, for Heaven's sake!

Moving on (yeah, I couldn't come up with a decent segue, so I'm just gonna jump right ahead), you should be able to spot right away that this is a parody of (or more accurately, an homage to) the original Star Trek television show. As cheesy as you may think either show is/was, I ask you how many shows you have produced that people still watch and admire today?

The script was a surprise to me as well. My expectations didn't exceed those of Plan 9 From Outer Space. I am almost embarrassed to say that I truly thought it was very well done. The scenes shot as the actual Galaxy Quest television show were scripted with just enough exaggeration to easily distinguish them from the rest of the movie, which contained scenes mimicking Galaxy Quest episodes.

After this possibly unbelievable praise, I feel an obligation to alert you, you MUST watch more than the opening scene before turning it off and declaring me looney. The first scene is part of an old episode of the Galaxy Quest television show. That being fair warning, I assure you that the rest of the movie is quite entertaining.

One final personal note: I am not usually one to give such a positive review (or any review at all, for that matter) to movies given cult status. But for this one, I make exception.

REMARKABLE DIALOGUE
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Gwen : Well, Alex, at least you had a part, okay? You had a part people loved. I mean, my TV Guide interview was six paragraphs about my boobs and how they fit into my suit. No one even bothered to ask what I do on the show.
  Fred : You had the…wait, wait, I'll think if it…
  Gwen : I repeated the computer, Fred.
• Alex : I won't say that stupid line one more time!
• Jason :[waving finger across throat] I gave you the 'kill' gesture.
  Gwen : No, I gave you the 'we're dead' signal. I was agreeing with you. Like I know where the 'hold' button is.
• Guy : Hey guys, there's a red thingy moving toward the green thingy.
  Jason : What?
  Guy : Red thingy moving toward the green thingy. I think…I think we're the green thingy.
• Fred :[very calmly and nonchalant] Hi guys. Listen, they're tellin' me that the, uh, the generators won't take it. The ship is breaking apart, and all that. Just FYI.
• Alex :[to Quellek] By Grathbar's hammer, by the Sons of Warvan, you shall be avenged!
• Gwen : Look. I have one job on this lousy ship! It's stupid, but I'm gonna do it, OKAY?!
• Gwen :[core implosion detonation countdown stops at 00:01:000] It always stops at 1 on the show!
• Gwen : Whoever wrote this episode should DIE!
• Sarris : You fool. You fail to realize that with your armor gone, my ship will tear through yours like tissue paper.
  Jason : And what you fail to realize is, my ship is dragging mines.
• Brandon :[racing out the door with an armful of fireworks] Be back soon!
  Brandon's Mother : Wait! Brandon, where are you going with all those fireworks?
  Brandon : Well, the Protector got super-accelerated coming out of the black hole and it, like, nailed the atmosphere at Mark 15, which, you guys know is pretty unstable, obviously, so we're gonna help Laredo guide it on the vox ultra-frequency carrier and use Roman candles for visual confirmation.
  Brandon's Mother : Alright…dinner's at seven. [turns to Brandon's Dad] Well, he's outside.

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰ /₁₀

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All the President's Men

MOVIE REVIEW OF All the President's Men (1976) R

Cast
Director:	alan j. pakula	Runtime: 2hrs 18min ( 138min)
carl bernstein	.....	dustin hoffman
bob woodward	.....	robert redford
harry rosenfeld	.....	jack warden
howard simons	.....	martin balsam
deep throat	.....	hal holbrook
ben bradlee	.....	jason robards
bookkeeper	.....	jane alexander
debbie sloan	.....	meredith baxter
martin dardis	.....	ned beatty
hugh sloan	.....	stephen collins
sally aiken	.....	penny fuller
foreign editor	.....	john mcMartin
donald segretti	.....	robert walden
frank wills	.....	frand wilis
eugene backinski	.....	david arkin
bernard l. barker	.....	henry calvert
eugenio r. martinez	.....	dominic chianese
markham	.....	nicholas coster
kay eddy	.....	lindsey ann crouse
miss milland	.....	valerie curtin
virgilio r. gonzales	.....	nate esformes
frank sturgis	.....	ron hale
james w. mcCord	.....	richard herd
alfred d. baldwin	.....	gene lindsey
carolyn abbott	.....	allyn ann mcLene
joe (fBI agent)	.....	jess osuna
And As Themselves In Archive Footage:
	Spiro Agnew
	walter cronkite
	gerald ford
	richard kleindienst
	pat nixon
	richard nixon
	ronald l. ziegler

WHAT I KNOW

The movie begins with actual (archived) news footage of June 1, 1972: President Nixon arriving at the Capitol building at 9:30 to address the House of Representatives. Next we see (end of news footage) the break-in at the Watergate Hotel, the Democratic headquarters at the time. In this opening scene, we watch as the break-in is being discovered and called in to authorities. [NOTE: The actor playing the security guard who discovers the break-in is played by the actual person who did so, Frank Wills.]

Before Oliver Stone, there was Alan Pakula. The difference here is the source. Pakula made his movie surrounding the Watergate Scandal from a book written by the two reporters who investigated and exposed the incident.

Bob Woodward (Robert Redford) is relatively new on the staff of the Washington Post, but he is an aggressive investigator. He teams up with fellow reporter Carl Bernstein (Dustin Hoffman), who initially sees Woodward as a mere rookie, but soon learns that he is dealing with a serious professional.

After a close brush with being thrown off the story, Woodward teams up with Bernstein to take on the task of exposing the Watergate scandal to the public.

They run into more roadblocks than progress. Most of these roadblocks include people who are evasive or act like they have no knowledge of the issue.

Woodward and Bernstein indirectly discover that witnesses are being intimidated into keeping quiet…and they're not very discreet about it. But the hush is effective enough to keep the reporters frustrated. However, they aren't about to give up.

Much of the success of the reporters is due to help from a mysterious anonymous source of Woodward's, dubbed Deep Throat (Hal Holbrook). At the time of the movie, the identity of this person was still unknown. In 2005, the identity of Deep Throat was finally revealed to be former FBI associate director William Mark Felt.

WHAT I THINK

Just to introduce the name Robert Redford into the content of any film or project is to praise it without question. This is no exception. A cast filled with stars just adds to this movie the extra bonus that sets it above the bar. Performances are superb. The story itself is intriguing, but might be a tad confusing in book form. Ironically, it is based on a book. So, if you are so inclined, I suggest you read it…before seeing this movie, if possible.

Robert Redford, Dustin Hoffman, and Jason Robards, among others, give their all and put their best into these characters. As if they ever don't.

I feel I must apologize for such a brief review, but there's not much else to say. As far as the writing, it's based on a book written by the characters themselves, so it's just simply great! I would be silly…okay, stupid…to say I would change anything. Music…there isn't much. Directing…I don't see anything notable…the focus is on the story, but nothing stands out as bad. Nothing outstanding, though…Sorry, Mr. Pakula.

I'm hoping that it is sufficient to say, that if you are interested in the Watergate investigation, you will love this movie. If you don't think you're interested in the investigation, I suggest you become interested, and watch this movie.

For those of you who know the outcome of the scandal, this is a documentary of the reporters who investigated and reported on the incident. For those who do not know the story, it is an intriguing political cliffhanger.

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Woodward : I don't mind what you did. I mind the way you did it.
• Cop : Are you sure you want us? Car 17 is closer, and they're in uniform.
  Dispatcher (voice) : They're getting gas. You take it.
• Deep Throat : Follow the money.
  Woodward : What do you mean? Where?
  Deep Throat : Oh, I can't tell you that.
  Woodward : But you could tell me that.
  Deep Throat : No, I have to do this my way. You tell me what you know, and I'll confirm. I'll keep you in the right direction if I can, but that's all. Just follow the money.
• MacGregor : I don't know! You're implying that I should know. If you print that, our relationship will be terminated.
  Woodward : Sir, we don't have a relationship.
• Woodward :[on the phone with Paul Herrera, who is speaking Spanish] Momento[sic]…Eh, do any of you guys speak Englis…er…any of you guys speak Spanish?
• Woodward :[to Bernstein] Is there anywhere you don't smoke?
• Woodward : How long have you worked at the committee?
  Ms. Abbott : Committee?
  Woodward : Yes, uh…the Committee to RE-Elect the President.
  Ms. Abbott : Oh, uh…Oh, I don't work at the Committee to RE-Elect the President. I work at Garfinkles. In the accounting department.
  Woodward : Ms. Abbott?
  Ms. Abbott : Yes.
  Woodward : Judith Abbott?
  Ms. Abbott : Carolyn…Abbott.
• Bernstein : I'm pourin' down the cups of coffee, trying to get it out of her before she throws me out of the house.
  Woodward : Give me the notes so I can start…
  Bernstein : These are the notes.
  Woodward : These are the notes?
  Bernstein : Yeah, I got stuff on napkins, matchbooks, I'm writing in the bathroom while she's gettin' the coffee. I'm a walking litter basket.
  Woodward : This is crazy. How am I gonna…
  Bernstein : Well, you'd be crazy too if you were operating on twenty cups of coffee.
• Spiro Agnew :[archive television footage] I have full confidence in Mister Mitchell…uh…and in the people in the Republican organization…and uh…I think that, uh, that kind of unattributed report at a time like this is, uh, counterproductive. You must bear in mind that, uh, those who published it have shown their sympathy for the other ticket.
• Deep Throat : What's the topic for tonight?
  Woodward : Ratfucking.
  Deep Throat : In my day, it was simply known as the 'double cross.' In our present context, it means infiltration of the Democrats.
• Deep Throat : I don't like newspapers. I don't care for inexact, acute, and shallowness.
  Woodward : CREEP's slush fund that financed the ratfucking…we've just about got that nailed down. I don't know how… [noise is heard in the distance]
  Deep Throat : Did you change cabs?
  Woodward : Yeah.
• Ronald Ziegler :[archive footage] Why is the Post trying to do it? They have a man, uh…the editor of the Post, by the name of Ben Bradlee. I think anyone who would want to honestly assess what his political persuasions are would, uh…uh, come to the conclusion quite quickly that he is not a supporter of President Nixon's. I respect the free press. I DON'T respect the type of journalism…the shabby journalism that is being practiced by the Washington Post. All I know is that the story that ran this morning is incorrect. It has been so stated as being incorrect by not only me, but by the individual whos grand jury…secret grand jury testimony they based their story on. That individual has denied that he ever so testified.
• Bradlee : Go on home. Rest up. Get a nice hot bath. Fifteen minutes. Then get your asses back in gear. We're under a lot of pressure, you know, and you put us there. Nothing riding on this except the First Amendment of the Constltution, freedom of the press, and maybe the future of the country. Not that any of that mattered…but if you guys fuck up again, I'm gonna get mad…G'night.
• Justice Earl Warren :[archive footage] If you will place your left hand on the Bible, and raise your right hand and please repeat after me…I, Richard Nixon, do solemnly swear…
  Richard Nixon : I, Richard Nixon, do solemnly swear…
  Warren : …that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States…
  Nixon : …that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States…
  Warren : …and will, to the best of my abilities…
  Nixon : …and will, to the best of my abilities…
  Warren : …preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States…
  Nixon : …preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States…
  Warren : …So help me God.
  Nixon : …So help me God.

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰ /₁₀

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The Trouble With Harry

MOVIE REVIEW OF The Trouble with Harry (1955) PG

Cast
Director:	alfred hitchcock	Runtime: 1hrs 39min ( 99min)
captain albert wiles	.....	edmund gwenn
sam marlowe	.....	john forsythe
miss ivy gravely	.....	mildred natwick
mrs. wiggs	.....	mildred dunnock
arnie roger	.....	jerry mathers
deputy sheriff calvin wiggs	.....	royal dano
millionaire	.....	parker fennelly
tramp	.....	barry macollum
dr. greenbow	.....	dwight marfield
jennifer rogers	.....	shirley macLaine
ellis	.....	ernest curt bach
man walking past sam's outdoor exhibition	.....	alfred hitchcock
harry worp	.....	philip truex
art critic from the modern museum	.....	leslie woolf

WHAT I KNOW

Little Arnie Rogers (Jerry Mathers) opens this tale as a three-foot kid running through the woods with his toy gun. He hears a shot...he goes a little further with a concerned, frightened look on his face, only to come across none other than a dead body (Philip Truex). He stared at it for a moment...then runs away.

Next we meet Captain Albert Wiles (Edmund Gwenn), who is out shooting rabbits (which is not allowed). On his way through that same forest, headed home after bagging exactly no dinner, finds the same body, stone dead, and naturally assumes that he himself shot and caused this young man's demise.

The Captain is terribly distraught, as he does not know who this dead man is lying on the ground before him.

As he is standing there, up the hill walks Miss Ivy Gravely (Mildred Natwick). She stands beside the Captain, obviously unsure of exactly what to say concerning this situation. So, naturally, the two (Ivy and the Captain) decide to have coffee and blueberry muffins that afternoon. They also decide that some Elderberry wine would go nicely with the repast. Miss Gravely walks away from Albert and the dead man, delighted.

Albert ducks out of sight as he sees little Arnie returning with his mother, Jennifer Rogers (Shirley MacLaine). We learn here that she knows the dead man, that his name is Harry, and that she is not upset that he is dead.

Albert stays hidden, for as soon as Jennifer and Arnie leave the scene, another person arrives. This time, it's Dr. Greenbow (Dwight Marfield). He, however, is so engrossed in a book, that he trips over the body (literally), losing his glasses on the ground. When he retrieves them, he again picks up his book and continues on his way.

Finally (we think), a tramp (Barry Macollum) wanders up the hill. By now, the Captain is thinking he aught to be selling tickets [author's commentary]. The tramp sees Harry, sits down, and takes the shoes for himself. [author's note: see John Grisham's novel "Theodore Boone: Kid Lawyer" for an interesting connection to this part of the story.]

The Captain leaves, and a little later on, other townspeople discover Harry. Sam Marlowe (John Forsythe), starving artist, is strolling along and stops to sketch the scenery. He approaches Harry to ask him to kindly remove himself from the area. Obviously, being dead and all, this proves impossible. So, Sam sits down and sketches Harry.

Finally (for real this time), Dr. Greenbow walks by again; again reading a book; again, tripping over Harry, losing his glasses; again, retrieving them and going on his way. Note that this is the town physician -- the one person in whom the townspeople trust their lives!

Once most people of the town are all aware of Harry (it looks as if Dr. Greenbow isn't really aware of much of anything), it becomes apparent that nobody is quite certain as to why he is dead. Or, more accurately, who is responsible for his death.

Captain Wiles is sure he shot Harry, by accident, while hunting for rabbits. Jennifer thinks Harry must have died after staggering away from her house. You see, she had just hit him over the head with a milk bottle (in those days, milk bottles were glass, not plastic)! However, Miss Gravely is convinced she is to blame for killing Harry with the leater heel of her hiking boot -- the one with the metal cleat on the end of it.

In the midst of all this, a wandering millionaire (Parker Fennelly) wants to buy all of Sam's paintings. Sam doesn't ask for money. Instead, he asks each of the aforementioned conspirators what they want the most. The millionaire writes down their wishes, and promises to grant the requests in exchange for the paintings. But what does Sam ask for? That is a request that is only whispered in the millionaire's ear.

By the way, all this is occurring under the nose of Mrs. Wiggs' (Mildred Dunnock) son, Calvin (Royal Dano), who also happens to be the Deputy Sheriff, and about the only person who does not know about Harry.

Oh, yeah…did I mention that Harry has been buried and exhumed a few or more times since this ordeal began? The people of this town are very indecisive.

Even when the gig seems to be up, the surprising quick wit of the townsfolk, along with convenient circumstance, prove useful in postponing what seems to be inevitable. Or is it? But wait…there's more…I think…

Out of respect for the famed director (by the way, did you find Alfred? He once again makes his trademark cameo appearance somewhere in the film), I won't reveal what happens to Harry in the end. You'll just have to see the movie. Don't worry…you'll find out.

WHAT I THINK

Twists and turns at every corner. Of course, what else should you expect from Alfred Hitchcock. And all with the whimsical comedic style we come to expect from the famed director. Dead bodies are darned funny, wouldn't you say? And who else would you expect to see making a film with such a storyline as…wait a minute…something's just not right there. There are just too many unknowns about and in this movie. Who really killed Harry? Should Harry be buried or not? Who really directed the movie? Was it The Alfred Hitchcock, or just someone with a really fortunate name?

I can pretty much guarantee that before this movie is over, you will have had a quizzical expression on your face at least three times…if you were paying attention.

This story, written by Jack Trevor Story (screenplay by John Michael Hayes), in itself is meant to be confusing. Beyond that, clever wordplay and thoughtful paradoxical situations are executed as only Alfred Hitchcock could. The audience is confused, the characters are confused, but everyone knows exactly what is happening at any given moment…but only for said given moment.

Of course, you will see some great stars helping out the movie. John Forsythe (unseen voice in Charlie's Angels), Shirley MacLaine (Steel Magnolias), Edmund Gwenn (Miracle on 34^th Street), and, of course, Jerry Mathers as The Beaver (ha!). Not that this story needs any help, it would have done just fine by itself. But don't take my word for it.

For those of you who are yearning for (or just planning) a Hitchcock marathon with the family, I would suggest an order of Hitchcock movies such as follows: Psycho, The Birds, Rope. The Trouble with Harry…then you can go to bed peacefully…

QUOTES
Finally, a short list of quotes I think are worth repeating. You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Mrs. Wiggs : I only brought your name up once when we were talking about strange people.
• Sam : Would you like to say a few words, Captain?
  Albert : That I would. Harry Worp, don't you ever show your face around here again.
• Albert : Coming home from Madagascar once we had a fireman on board who hit his head on a brick wall and died two days later.
  Sam : Where would he find a brick wall on board a ship?
  Albert : That's what we always wondered.
• Jennifer : Did you see his mustache and his wavy hair?
  Sam : When I saw him, he was dead.
  Jennifer : He looked exactly the same when he was alive, only he was vertical.
• Sam : Who's the man up on the path?
  Jennifer : What man?
  Sam : You know, Harry. The dead man.
  Jennifer : Oh, him. That's my husband.
  Sam : Your husband's dead, then?
  Jennifer : [nods] Is your lemonade sweet enough?
  Sam : Seems to be.
  Jennifer : I like it tart.
  Sam : Harry is Arnie's father, then?
  Jennifer : Nah. Arnie's father's dead.
  Sam : So's Harry.
• Sam : Perhaps I'll come back tomorrow.
  Arnie : When's that?
  Sam : Day after today.
  Arnie : That's yesterday. Today's tomorrow.
  Sam : It was.
  Arnie : When was tomorrow yesterday, Mr. Marlow?
  Sam : Today.
  Arnie : Oh, sure. Yesterday.
  Jennifer : You'll never make sense out of Arnie. He's got his own timing.

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰ /₁₀

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You Can't Take It With You

MOVIE REVIEW OF You Can't Take It With You (1938) Not Rated

Cast
Director:	Frank Capra	Runtime: 2hrs 6min ( 126min)
Alice Sycamore	.....	Jean Arthur
Martin Vanderhof	.....	Lionel Barrymore
Tony Kirby	.....	James Stewart
Anthony P. Kirby	.....	Edward Arnold
Kolenkhov	.....	Mischa Auer
Essie Carmichael	.....	Ann Miller
Penny Sycamore	.....	Spring Byington
Paul Sycamore	.....	Samuel S. Hinds
mr. poppins	.....	donald meek
mr. ramsey	.....	h. b. warner
mr. dePinna	.....	halliwell hobbes
ed carmichael	.....	dub taylor
mrs. anthony kirby	.....	mary forbes
rheba	.....	lillian yarbo
donald	.....	eddie anderson
john blakely	.....	clarence wilson
professor	.....	josef swickard
maggie o' neill	.....	ann doran
mr. schmidt	.....	christian rub
mrs. schmidt	.....	bodil rosing
wilbur g. henderson	.....	charles lane
judge	.....	harry davenport
mike the detective	.....	ward bond
police guard at courtroom entrance	.....	pat flaherty
inmate	.....	pert kelton
attorney to kirby	.....	edwin maxwell
restaurant patron	.....	frank mcClure
kirby's secretary	.....	ian wolfe
child dancer	.....	billy wolfstone

PLOT SUMMARY

Meet Mr. Martin Vanderhof's household. (Be careful...you might not come back...you might never want to.) There's Grandpa (Lionel Barrymore), he collects stamps and enjoys life; Penny Sycamore (Spring Byington), she is Grandpa's daughter who writes plays on a typewriter that was delivered to the house by accident; Penny's husband Paul (Samuel S. Hinds), he builds fireworks in the basement; Penny and Paul's daughter Essie (Ann Miller), who makes homemade candies, but really wants to be a dancer (regardless of her teacher's (Mischa Auer) constant, but confidential, opinion that she steenks!); Essie's husband Ed (Dub Taylor), who spends almost every waking hour (when he isn't delivering Essie's candies) playing the xylophone; Alice (Jean Arthur), the Marilyn Munster of the family, working as a stenographer for Anthony P. Kirby (Edward Arnold), a frustrated and seemingly ruthless banker whose son Tony (James Stewart) wants to marry the aforementioned Alice; Mr. DePinna (Halliwell Hobbs), he delivered ice to the house one day and never left...he now helps Paul build his fireworks; Mr. Poppins (Donald Meek), he makes up things and then builds them; and there's Rheba (Lillian Yarbo) and Donald (Eddie Anderson...remember Rochester from The Jack Benny Program?...Remember Jack Benny?...No?...Shame on you), they are the housekeepers, then known as the help, and they enjoy their life as much as the rest of the family.

Now meet the Kirbys. Arthur P. Kirby is a stuffy banking mogul who is trying unsuccessfully to buy Grandpa's house in order to secure an enormous business deal; his wife, Mrs. Kirby...duh (Mary Forbes) who is nothing more than aristocratic high-society personified; and Tony, their son, who is, and wants, none of that. Tony just wants to marry Alice. You can only imagine the sort of story that ensues from this situation. (Or, of course, you could watch the movie!)

TECH INSPECTION

You Can't Take It With You says it all. Although I would not call this a feel good movie, it certainly does make you feel good. EDITOR'S NOTE: I consider most feel good movies to be mostly objet fromage.

There is so much common sense proposed that I find it sickening to realize the novelty of the ideas. The family portrayed in this story is the epitome of, while not the perfect life, at least the best life. I will argue that there is a difference (but that's another post).

This is the sort of movie that gets you thinking once again about everything in your own life. It will make you pause to ask yourself, "Why not?" Or in some cases, "Why?...No, really...Why?" And I'm going to guess you'll be hard-pressed to find an answer you don't have to rationalize.

Taxes, relationships, power, money, social image; all are fair game for ridicule and debate. After watching this movie, I challenge you to log on to Facebook. Scroll down and peruse your newsfeed. Count how many important notifications you see. Contemplate for more than three seconds just how much better the world is now that everyone is aware (for the thirteen-zillionth time) that Johnny Hellifeyeknoe needs yet another brain transplant (because apparently the first one didn't take). Of course, Johnny's drivers-license-quality stock photo as a bald waif with fish tank hoses coming out of every orifice is enough to convince you to wire your entire yearly grocery budget to his North Korean Trust Company.

I wouldn't be surprised to learn that many people define their life as the quest for knowledge as delivered via Twitter®. On the other end of the spectrum, there are those who believe (and I admit, some rightly so) that if their credit score dips below 760 (i.e. excellent), they might as well apply for a permanent cot at the homeless shelter.

This movie puts both those schools of thought to shame. Perhaps the greatest example is the tax man scene (see below). The popular aphorism suggests that death and taxes are the only two things in life which are unavoidable. Mr. Vanderhof puts that one to disagreement; a conversation worth transcribing and carrying with you to your next IRS audit.

With a multiple-star cast including Jean Arthur, James Stewart, Edward Arnold, and the legendary Lionel Barrymore, giving them an already highly successful stage script, and putting it all under the direction of none other than Frank Capra, you've got a movie that blows the socks off of Citizen Kane.

WILBUR G. HENDERSON, IRS

• Henderson : Mr. Vanderhof, the government wants to talk to you about a matter of income tax.
  Vanderhof : Income tax?
  Henderson : Mr. Vanderhof, we've written many letters about this, but we've received no reply.
  Vanderhof : That's what those letters were. Did you hear that, Penny? This is the party that's been writing to me.
  Henderson : Well, it's not me, Mr. Vanderhof. You see, the Internal Revenue Office [Henderson is interrupted by various forms of chaos around the room…then when the interruptions subside…] Mr. Vanderhof, I've got to be going.
  Vanderhof : Oh, too bad. I'm sorry you can't stay to dinner. Drop in again.
  Henderson : If you don't mind, I'd like to settle my business before I go.
  Penny : [To Tony, who has dropped in to see Alice] He's selling something for the government.
  Vanderhof : What can I do for you?
  Henderson : Mr. Vanderhof, our records show that you have never paid any income tax.
  Vanderhof : That's right.
  Henderson : Why not?
  Vanderhof : I don't believe in it.
  Henderson : You don't believe in it?! [Another interruption, then…] Now, see here, Mr. Vanderhof, whether you believe in it or not, you owe the government 22 years of back income taxes.
  Ed : Hey, wait a minute. That's too far back. That's outlawed, ain't it?
  Henderson : What's your name?
  Ed : What difference does that make?
  Henderson : Did you ever file an income tax return?
  Ed : No, sir.
  Henderson : What was your income last year?
  Ed : I don't know...'bout 85 dollars wasn't it, Essie?
  Essie : I don't know. [Henderson gives an annoyed expression and returns to Vanderhof]
  Henderson : Now, Mr. Vanderhof, that's a serious thing, not filing an income tax return.
  Vanderhof : Now, just suppose I do pay you this money. Mind you, I don't say that I'm going to, but just for the sake of argument, what's the government going to do with it?
  Henderson : What do you mean?
  Vanderhof : What do I get for my money? For instance, if I go into a department store and buy something, why, there it is, I can see it. Well, what are they going to give me?
  Henderson : The government gives you everything. It protects you.
  Vanderhof : From what?
  Henderson : Well, invasion. How do you think the government's going to keep up the Army and Navy, with all those battleships?
  Vanderhof : Battleships? Last time we used battleships was in the Spanish-American War [EDITOR'S NOTE: Battleships had actually been used one more time in WWII] and what did we get out of that? Cuba. And we gave that back. I wouldn't mind paying for something sensible.
  Henderson : Something sensible! What about Congress and the Supreme Court and the President? We've got to pay them, don't we?
  Vanderhof : Not with my money, no, sir.
  Henderson : Now, wait a minute. I didn't come here to argue with you. Mr. Vanderhof, all I know is you haven't paid any income tax, and you've got to pay it.
  Vanderhof : [Becoming disinterested and gazing about the room...] What was that?
  Henderson : I said you've got to pay it.
  Vanderhof : Well, you've got to show me.
  Henderson : We don't have to show you. I just told you. Who's going to pay for all those buildings in Washington and interstate commerce? And the Constitution?
  Vanderhof : The Constitution has been paid for years ago. And as for interstate commerce…What is interstate commerce, anyway?
  Henderson : There are 48 states, see? [EDITOR'S NOTE: This was 1938.] And if it weren't for interstate commerce, nothing could go from one state to another, see?
  Vanderhof : Well, why not? Have they got fences?
  Henderson : No, they haven't got fences. They've got laws. Holy smokes! I never ran across anything like this before.
  Vanderhof : Well, I might pay about 75 dollars, but it isn't worth a cent more.
  Henderson : You'll pay every cent just like anybody else. Now listen to me. You'll go to jail if you don't pay. That's law. If you think you're bigger than that, you've got another thing coming. You're just the same as everyone else [Ed begins to play the xylophone as Essie starts dancing around the room] and the sooner you get that through your head, the better [Paul's fireworks start exploding from the basement] Holy smokes! [Henderson races out the door.]

QUOTES
In no way does the previous scene take place of my favorite quotes. That said...You may recognize some, but these are my own picks, not ones that are particularly famous:

• Kirby : With the world going crazy, the next big move is munitions…do you realize there won't be a bullet, gun, or cannon made in this country without us?
  Tony : Now, Dad, don't tell me you've forgotten the slingshot market?
• Blakely : What are they, a bunch of nuts?
  Bill : Fascinating ones!
• Vanderhof : Mrs. Penny, why don't you write a play about 'ism' mania?
  Penny : 'ism' mania?
  Vanderhof : Yeah, sure. You know, communism, fascism, voodooism. Everybody's got an 'ism' these days…when things get a little bad nowadays, you go out and get yourself an 'ism' and you're in business.
• Vanderhof : Lincoln said, 'With malice toward none, with charity for all.' Nowadays they say, 'Think the way I do, or I'll bomb the daylights out of you.'
• Essie : Ed made up a beautiful song today by Chopin.
• Vanderhof : Essie making any progress, Kolenkhov?
  Kolenkhov : Confidentially, she stinks.
  Vanderhof : As long as she's having fun.
• Vanderhof : …with the right handling, I think we can even thaw out Mrs. Kirby in time.

RATING

Here is my personal rating of this movie. This rating is out of ten meows.
¹⁰ /₁₀

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